It's quite an accomplishment to allow those we love to simply be who they are, without wishing or attempting to change them. No one is totally good or totally bad. Falling in love, we tend to see no flaws or annoying habits in the person. This isn't fair to them. As we get to know him or her better and settle into a relationship, flaws and annoyances take center stage, and put the loved one at a huge disadvantage, possibly killing the relationship. This isn't fair to them either.
Consider having and raising children... every parent thinks that the newborn they cradle in their arms is perfect. That is to the child's advantage initially, until they grow to the teenage years, for example. Seeing them as perfect teenagers (LOL!!!) is a huge disadvantage to their development and a parent's sanity.
"Live and let live" seems to work pretty well,
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