Saturday, November 24, 2018

The Surgery That Didn't Happen

     The best-laid plans...
     I did not have hip replacement surgery. I asked one-too-many questions via email, the offender question being one inquiring if there was any alternative to a (now I know "required") post-surgery drug. Eight days before the scheduled surgery, a woman from the doctor's staff (not the doctor himself, mind you) called to tell me that the doctor cancelled the surgery because "he is afraid you won't follow his orders." And no, I could not speak to the doctor. To tell you how much they wanted rid of me, I had my refund check from the practice two days later in the mail.
     I was stunned and upset, as I had been looking forward to the end of a nearly constant ache. Then I realized that it would not be in my best interests to go into surgery with any sort of contentious relationship with the surgeon. So I spent the day in a combination of tears and anger. On the bright side, the angry energy enabled me to get a lot of house cleaning done. I was also blessed with an understanding MELT/yoga class that encouraged me to practice along with them (rather than just demonstrate), and the practices calmed me down and restored much peace to my spirit.
     The next day, I decided upon waking that I was not going to let this sudden change of plans ruin another day. Peace reigns in my soul relative to all this. Some follow-up thoughts and actions include:

  • I bless the doctor to do his very best for those he does operate on.
  • It's comical that he found me such a risk, as I may have been one of the healthiest people for whom he ever did hip replacement.
  • I feel compassion for the poor woman who had to call me on the doctor's behalf. What a crap job!
  • I've made an appointment with another surgeon.
  • For the most part, my hip has been feeling better since the cancellation. 
  • I know there's a bigger picture here, everything happens for a reason, and I'm excited to see how all this unfolds. 

     Curiously enjoying the adventure of life,

Monday, November 12, 2018

Our Reasons for Being Here

     I had an extraordinarily pleasant and profound learning experience this past Saturday in a four-hour workshop in Dallas presented by Esther Hicks channeling Abraham. (If unfamiliar with this, google "Abraham-Hicks.") Any experience listening to or reading Abraham materials leaves me feeling so loved and appreciative of my life and circumstances. Actually being in Esther's presence as she is channeling, however, is love on super-steroids.
     There were many wonderful insights that I carried away with me, but my favorite was Abraham's description of our reasons for being here. Yes, we chose to come into physical form for a triangle of reasons. The three sides of the triangle are EXPANSION, FREEDOM and JOY.
     Expansion is inevitable. It is happening all over the Universe. It is an eternal force that cannot be stopped. We earthlings are on the leading edge of creation, responsible (whether we like it or not) for the lives we create for ourselves. Everyone is creative, and our creation tool is our thoughts.
     Freedom is the foundation of life on Planet Earth. Everyone has free will, the ability to choose. There is always a choice, whether we like it or not, whether we can discern it or not. Like expansion, freedom is a given relative to Earth life, not something we have to make happen.
     So lastly, our big choice is whether or not to live a life of JOY. Abraham encourages us to take the path of least resistance, to do what makes us feel good, as evidenced by our emotions, which are our guidance system. Abraham's biggest challenge seems to be to convince us humans that we are supposed to feel good. When we feel good, our vibration is high, which attracts high-vibration good to us. So-called "negative" emotions are really only indicators that we are lowering our vibration and being resistant to the good that is always coming our way.
      One of my favorite Abraham quotes is "Our prayer for you is that you love yourself more today than yesterday, and more tomorrow than today." What a fine goal, to choose joy in this way. This is not selfish or conceited. Just think, if everyone on the planet loves themselves and feels good, would we have violence, discord, hatred, revenge, blame, etc, etc, etc? No. So let's do our part to uplift the world!
      Choosing JOY,

Thursday, November 1, 2018

Why Do I Write? My Ongoing Debate...

     I have published two books. While many folks say they have a book in them, that's mostly where it stays. I have actually gone through the "whole nine yards" of bringing two books into form. I should feel proud of these efforts and creations, and I do. I'm good with the idea of expressing my own unique voice--that I'm not saying anything new, but saying it in a way that only I can.
     I believe that what I write is a download from Spirit. Writing is a powerful spiritual practice for me. The first book I wrote was a surprise. I just decided to start writing on a nearly daily basis, and it developed into a book. The second book was intended to be a book from the very start, with very explicit directions from Spirit relative to the format, title and contents. I was even inspired to include my own artwork in it, which was completely "outside the box" for me.
     I am once again being nudged to write another book. This has been going on for some time, and I have a good idea for the theme, and even a start of an outline. Unlike the two previous books, this one would require LOTS of time and research, potentially even a "coffee table" book with color photos, an extremely expensive proposition.
     I self-published the two previous works, the first with PublishAmerica (now America Star) and the second with Amazon's CreateSpace. The world of publishing is beyond my comprehension. I have no interest in the effort and rejection inevitability of having a "publisher." Possibly that's my personal author defeat right there. 
     I lost money on the first book, and I would not recommend America Star to anyone. I've broken even on the second book, and I loved the CreateSpace process. These money statements do not count my writing time--only a NY Times bestseller could compensate me reasonably for that. However, as I said, I enjoyed the actual writing tremendously as a wide-open powerful connection with Spirit.
     In neither case did I write the book for money. I was spiritually motivated. However, it is so discouraging, ultimately, to put in so much effort and get so little return. Do I want to invest way more time into a way more pricey effort?
     I don't know if I can stand the disappointment of another mediocre showing. I'm not good or much interested in energetic promotion. Given past history, I don't know if I'm mentally strong enough to make a third book financially successful. I would also suggest that there's probably some limit to how many books a friend or relative will buy, just because they know the author.
     I don't write this blog for the money. It's just plain fun, and it doesn't take up a lot of time.
     To be clear, I am not afraid of putting myself "out there." I guess I don't get noticed enough to be criticized!
     I know I can create the time to write another book, should I decide I want to do it. I wrote most of the second book while immersed in a more than full-time job during tax season. It's also useful to remember that I could simply start with some "baby steps" and see where it goes.
     I suspect this debate is simply part of the process of testing my commitment and guiding me to ever greater good in my future. I do have faith in that. I also know that ultimately it does not matter one way or another whether I write a third book.
     So for now, the debate continues.