Tuesday, January 12, 2021

January 12--It Can Be Messy

We spend our lives avoiding the situations that help us grow. It's when we stay with uncertainty and discomfort without trying to fix it that we connect with our own innate joy, wisdom, and love.  --Pema Chodron

    Here's an excellent piece of advice: when you encounter someone who is crying, let it be. Don't touch, speak, comfort or attempt to fix him or her. Doing so displays your discomfort with his or her distress. This was a new concept offered to me many years ago at a retreat, and upon considering it, I have found it to be very wise. If I'm crying, I don't want to be fixed. I just want to do some soul-rinsing, a vital human capability. 
    "Situations that help us grow" certainly can be messy, and it's not unusual to attempt to avoid such. The trouble is, however, that they don't go away. They keep presenting themselves to us until we deal with them, "staying with the uncertainty and discomfort," until we free the pent-up emotional energy that has disconnected us from our inner joy. At 65, having spent decades working on those "situations," I can say I am glad for every bit of effort, no matter how messy. I will have those "situations" as long as I live, but each time one is conquered and released, it makes me stronger and more willing to take on the next. My "innate joy, wisdom, and love" continue to expand. 
    Be brave,
        Leta



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