November 17--Too Much Energy Going to Pain

If you are doing something to avoid pain, then pain is running your life. 
--Michael Singer

    Yesterday's crankiness encountered a kindred spirit and bless the human sense of humor, we were able to laugh our way out of it. I shared a photo of a couple items from my post-it note collection (below). 

    Today's quote was my morning "2x4 upside the head." Pain has been running my life since being in Bali. Even as I grow physically stronger and pain lessens, I have an ongoing fear of pain, so it's still running my life. I'm now halfway through PT for my left foot/ankle/calf, six more sessions to go. I succumbed to scheduling a long overdue physical for mid-December. Despite six weeks of PT on my right shoulder, it has shown no improvement, though I got some temporary relief from a shot. So in December, I have the physical, conclude my foot PT, and get another shoulder shot. I declare that when those are complete, I am DONE with medical attention for the entirety of 2026 (and hopefully beyond!!). Any remaining aches and pains will simply be lived with and I will keep moving. 

    Weary of the "organ recital," our common term for excessive medical/ailment talk.

        Leta

Poor sleep is the big culprit!

November 16--Is It Nap Time Yet?

Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy. --Exodus 20:8

    I'm cranky from poor sleep, so I'm taking the day off. Alas, I wish sleeplessness was as beautiful as the painting below.

        Leta

"Sleeplessness at Night" by 
Leonid Afremov

November 15--Let Us Use Imagination Wisely

No one has ever hurt their eyes by looking on the bright side.  --Mary Davis

    I have a magic magnifying morbid mind. I think that Grammie dying suddenly when I was four years old implanted the idea that something horrible could happen at any minute, and my imagination went wild and never stopped. My interminably long recovery from sciatica and the current U.S. political horror have only exacerbated the scariness. When I head down a frightening path, I'm developing the practice of dragging my thoughts in a more positive direction, while giving myself credit for my vivid imagination. I'll say to myself, "Good one! But that's not helping my mood, let's go elsewhere." That same imagination that scares me also enables me to paint, garden and write a blog. 

    Less terror, please!

        Leta

Nature's beauty in our neighborhood

November 14--BUGS! and Such

My mother is a walking miracle.  --Leonardo DiCaprio

    Why am I having goofy thoughts this morning about my long-deceased mother? She passed in 1979 at the young age of 61, so for the bulk of my life, I have been motherless. 

    She had a thing about bugs, most especially roaches, lice and bed bugs. She believed that having any of those critters in one's home was a clear sign of "white trash." (Note that I grew up in an area with very few non-WASPs.) Those bugs were a crisis to be avoided at all cost. 

    Dishwashers, Kleenex and margarine were Communist plots. Dishwashers wasted water, and who needed one when you had a daughter (me) perfectly capable of washing dishes? Kleenex were wasteful--use a handkerchief. And margarine--Good Heavens! Why would you use fake stuff when you had real butter?!!? I grew up in a family that worshiped butter, and I still do to this day! 

    Mom loved her roses and she had a bed of about a dozen bushes in the back yard. Japanese beetles were the bane of her existence. She was generally an organic gardener, but for her roses, no chemical was too strong to keep them thriving and bug-free. She raised and preserved, via canning or freezing, nearly all our fruits and vegetables. 

    Mom never drank alcohol. Dad drank enough for both of them, and I think not-drinking was her one truly self-righteous stance. She brought a bottle of champagne back from France around 1971, and never drank it. We found it when we cleaned out the house many years later. 

    Mom took me on trips to France, Italy, Canary Islands and Japan. She was always trying to sneak back home cuttings from exotic plants. She would certainly be "pulled aside" at airports these days!

    Her favorite late night snack for watching Johnny Carson was to fry up a batch of chicken livers. 

    I would easily label Mom as a hypochondriac, and she spent hours poring over our two-volume medical encyclopedia (yes, actual books in those days!) trying to figure out what was wrong with her. 

    In hindsight, I'm amazed that I turned out even close to "normal."

        Leta

Bird of Paradise, Mom's favorite non-rose flower

November 13--Life As It Is

Just for today, rest in the acceptance of what is. Don't judge it or analyze it. Rest where you are in your heart. Allow gratitude to pour freely from your soul. Decide to love your life today. Just as it is. Especially as it is.  --Mary Davis

    This sentiment is a challenge for me. My healing journey is dragging on, now with foot issues requiring me to rest from pickleball and limiting my walking. Days have settled into exercises, swimming, painting and watching basketball. Twice a week the routine is supplemented with physical therapy. It is easy to become bored, so I remind myself that I do like all those activities. The phrases "one day at a time" and "this, too, shall pass" are sanity-savers. After swimming seven days in a row, I think I shall take advantage of our glorious weather and do some winter-prep in the garden rather than swimming. That will help my "acceptance of what is" and my gratitude level. Hands in the dirt is fine therapy.

    Below is the photo of the northern lights my son sent last night from Minnesota. 

    Enjoy today!

        Leta

November 12--A Good Education

We never know the love of a parent till we become parents ourselves. 
--Henry Ward Beecher

    I've worked through a lot of angst relative to my upbringing and the people I was closest to. I know they loved me and did the best they could. I do not know much at all about any early life experiences that helped to shape them. There is much to appreciate about these flawed (like every one of us) folks, so here goes...

    My mother taught me to sew, crochet and cook, skills that I have used my whole life. She somehow passed on the joy of gardening even though I did not appreciate it at the time. She taught me to clean house and iron, skills I would rather not have! Mom is the one who planted the "travel bug" in me, taking me on trips to France, Italy, Canary Islands and Japan. 

    Dad taught me to swim, still my favorite exercise. He had his own business and passed on a wealth of knowledge about the administration, customer service and grind of it all. He rescued me many hours from home with truck rides to deliver lumber. He taught me about stock market investing. He instilled in me the value of generosity. He put me through college and grad school.

    I am grateful,

        Leta

HOT!!!
My brother's wedding, 1961

November 11--Appreciating Their Service

Here is the Kansas connection to Veteran's Day, written by Jason English:

The reason we celebrate Veterans Day on November 11 dates back to 1918, when an armistice between the Allies and Germany was signed that essentially ended World War I. The first Armistice Day was celebrated the following November 11.
World War I was billed as the war to end all wars, but of course it didn’t. By the 1950s, with so many American veterans of World War II and the conflict in Korea, some thought the term "Armistice Day" was outdated.
Alvin King, a shoe repairman from Emporia, Kansas, probably isn’t in many history books, but he deserves at least a paragraph. In the early 1950s, he thought "Armistice Day" was too limiting. He had lost family in World War II, and thought all American veterans of all wars should be honored on November 11. So he formed a committee and, in 1953, the city of Emporia celebrated Veterans Day.
Ed Rees, Emporia’s congressman, loved the idea and took it to Washington. President Eisenhower—another Kansan—liked King’s idea, too. In 1954, Eisenhower formally changed November 11 to Veterans Day and invited some of Emporia’s residents to be there when he signed the bill. King was one of those invited, but there was one problem: he didn’t own a nice suit. His veteran friends chipped in and bought him a proper suit and paid his way from Kansas to the White House.
In 2003, Congress passed a resolution declaring Emporia the founding city of Veterans Day.

    I am grateful to all those who have served us and fought for freedom!

        Leta

Including my brother, Arlie, an Army Ranger
who served 2 tours in Viet Nam 

November 10--Down the Rabbit Hole

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.  --Steve Martin

    Occasionally I come up with a question that makes me wonder and wander aimlessly. Here goes. With the billions of stars out there in our universe, why is outer space dark? Aren't there enough mighty stars out there to keep things well lit? Well, those stars are really far apart. But if there are photons of light shooting out of the sun, do they just fizzle out at some point? Where does a star's light end? And when I am on the side of planet Earth that is temporarily facing away from our sun, why can't I still see the sunlight shooting past the earth in all directions? 

    I could get weird about electricity, too, but I'll spare you!

        Leta

Jamaican sunshine

November 9--"The Devil You Know..."

Your nervous system will always choose a familiar hell over an unfamiliar heaven. –Sarah Alpern

    Isn't it interesting that the only constant in life is change, yet we humans are hard-wired to avoid it? I see multiple examples of this in my life. This is what keeps people mired in addiction... "the devil you know..." I am so thankful for the 12-Step programs that offer folks a (simple but not easy) plan to reach the heaven of recovery. I see in myself that I am very familiar with aches and pains, but being pain-free with no physical issues? That is a heaven that I find difficult to imagine. I'm thinking this is the basis for the cliche that men "marry their mother" and women "marry their father."

    This one deserves much more pondering!

        Leta 

This is the photo of the real Swilcan Bridge
at St. Andrew's Old Course in Scotland

November 8--Check Your Focus

These are excerpts from today's "Daily Guide" in Science of Mind magazine. It was written by Rev. Dr. David Ault. 

In the Tibetan Dzogchen tradition, the nature of mind is often likened to the sky — vast, open and fundamentally unchanging. Phenomena such as thoughts, emotions and life events are clouds that pass through the sky. No matter how dark or turbulent the clouds become, they never alter the sky’s
essential nature...
When we identify with the cloud — with fear, limitation, separation — we create from that illusion. But when we remember we are the sky — limitless, spacious, eternal — we tap into the creative law and live from that power. The path, then, is not about attempting to control clouds. It is about remembering the constancy of sky, abiding in our true identity and creating, not from fear or lack, but from the knowing that wholeness is already ours.

    I like this! I focus too much on the clouds!

        Leta

November 7--One Day at a Time

Do not try to approach God with your thinking mind. It may only stimulate your intellectual ideas, activities, and beliefs. Try to approach God with your crying heart. It will awaken your soulful, spiritual consciousness.  --Sri Chinmoy

    Yesterday was a meltdown day. I have them periodically, frustrated with the lingering issues from sciatica that cause every step I take to hurt. I expect I must be fairly unpleasant to live with. I said a version of "screw it" regarding my daily exercises--I have been doing them faithfully for months, and still I can't walk comfortably. Yes, I've made a LOT of progress, and I SHOULD be grateful. Sometimes the aggravation is just too much, and I have to vent. 

    What did I do to pull myself out of my funk? I made myself go swimming, generally my first step when I need to calm down. I took a lovely nap. I did some venting in my journal. I had a chiropractic appointment--doc couldn't fix the problem, but she was sympathetic and gave me some pointers to work on my foot. And I did a lot of painting--it is intense enough to distract me from everything else.  

    Somewhere along the way, I need to accept the effects of aging. I'm most definitely not there yet. 

        Leta

Chihuly glass, Adelaide, Australia...
Art is essential to life!

November 6--More Tomorrow

Crying is cleansing. There's a reason for tears, happiness or sadness. 
--Dionne Warwick

    I'm safely back home from Colorado, a great trip. I'm in the midst of some good soul-rinsing, and I shall write more tomorrow. 

        Leta

November 5--Encouraging Curiosity

Assumptions breed suffering but curiosity breeds compassion. --David Ault

    I know for certain that I make a lot of assumptions. It is easy to do and challenging to stop the practice. The propensity to make assumptions and the destruction caused by it are blatantly evident in our political landscape today. I have no ability to stop the blowhards from spouting false assumptions, but I can work on the practice in my personal relationships. I am well aware that the effects of my upbringing lead me to assumptions that can be "way out in left field." There have been times when I have expressed an assumption to my spouse, and he looks at me like a Martian has just materialized in front of him. 

    The phrase "There, but for the grace of God, go I" bubbled up to me. This gives the speaker a comforting sense of God's favor while recognizing that God has screwed the person being scrutinized. What an exceedingly rude assumption! 

    A spiritual teacher many years ago offered this wise practice when faced with something that might incite assumption-making: just say internally "Isn't that interesting!" and move on. That three word phrase leads to curiosity, and cuts off the tendency to make a story filled with assumptions. 

    One of "The Four Agreements" (book by Don Miguel Ruiz) is "don't make assumptions." The book is subtitled "A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom." That's a pretty powerful reward for stopping the assumption practice. 

    More curiosity, fewer assumptions!

        Leta

The Curiosity Cycle from
Psychology Today

November 4--I Take That Back!

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.  --Bob Hope

    So much for no golf this year, sort of. My son took me to a golf simulator and I had a blast swinging the clubs and learning about the system. It is amazing. He picked St. Andrews Old Course. Having not swung a club in a year, I played the junior tees 😀 I have been to the actual course in Scotland. Since it was pouring rain then, no one was playing, and travel bud Lanie & I were able to walk #18, and get our photo taken on the Swilcan Bridge, the famous "landmark" on the course. 

    Since I had not played in a year, we did holes 1-9 and 16-18 on the simulator. It felt SO good to swing the clubs. The sand traps on this course are deep holes with steep, solid sides. When I hit into one (and only one!!), my son said he would hit it out for me. I wanted to try and I was successful on my first attempt! If it happened on the real course, I don't think I could even get my body in and out of the trap, let alone hit a ball out. 

    Afterwards, my husband said, "I haven't seen you this happy in months!" I can hardly wait to do it again and learn more about the system--that's the techy nerd in me. 

        Leta

The golf simulator version of the Swilcan Bridge;
I'll find my actual photo in a couple days & post it.

November 3--Life Requires Adjustments

The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.  --Alan Watts

    I am in Colorado visiting our younger son. Mental adjustments are gradually happening. Our older son and his family, including my two grandsons, used to live here; now they live in Minnesota. This is the first time that our sons have lived in different places. So it was weird driving out here for the first time knowing I wouldn't be seeing the grandsons and parents, nor would I ever see their former home again. 

    For the first time since our younger son turned 10 (when he was old enough to be on the golf course; he's 36 now), I have gone a whole season without playing golf. I played so poorly last year that I did not enjoy it, then sciatica and recovery from it made golf a mere dream this year. I am looking forward to a return to play in 2026, trying to keep my expectations extremely low. 

    My schedule for the past six months has revolved around physical therapy appointments. I've had more medical attention this year than in any former year of my life, even when I had my hip replaced. I'm hoping that 2026 holds only my routine chiropractor visits and nothing more. That's a part of "getting my life back."

    Life changes, we adapt to the new whether we like it or not.

        Leta

A fine reminder!

November 2--"No Joy in Mudville" (Ernest Lawrence Thayer)

When I get stuck, I lower my standards.  --William Stafford

    This is a good reminder for me about writing this blog. Every post is not Pulitzer-worthy, I write for me, and it really does not matter if anyone reads it. Being a "grammar nerd," I edit relentlessly, but even that does not matter. Some days the post I've written doesn't feel that good, and that's OK. 

    So, as you can tell, I'm stuck! I am in a different space of mourning this morning, because baseball is officially over for 2025. Plus, alas and dang it, the Dodgers won the World Series last night in a very exciting 11-inning game. Now I turn my sights to March 26, 2026--Opening Day for the Cubs, my favorite day of the year. Winter is SO long 😞 

    We "fell back" early this morning, leaving daylight savings time once again. I'd sure like to stop the nonsense of spring and fall time changes. I've noticed via recent articles that some states are more ready for the change than others. Arizona is tough enough to keep track of... what if we had a random handful of states that decided to follow Arizona's lead? How would we keep track? Let's just eliminate the time change for the whole country!

    Mountains are in my future,

        Leta

A LONG winter ahead...

November 1--Grief = Love Lost

Grief changes shape, but it never ends.  --Keanu Reeves

    I would say that in general, we humans are fairly forgiving and quite willing to offer "second chances." Even in baseball, one gets three strikes. So much can be fixed by a "do-over" or making amends. We learn to "do better next time." 

    I think that is partly why death, losing a loved one, is so difficult. It's forever, which to our little human psyches doesn't make sense; it is incomprehensible, yet right in our faces. My brain keeps repeating, "I can't believe _____ is gone forever." There is a lovely story on Upworthy.com about a fourth-grade teacher describing grief to her students, and the subsequent outpouring of the students from her story. (Upworthy is good positive news, much needed in our world today!) I appreciate the teacher's idea that grief takes up space in our hearts and minds and can make them less available to everyday life tasks and emotions... less patient, distracted, overwhelmed. 

    It has begun. While I've lost quite a few family members (I'm the only one remaining from my family of origin), the friend who passed this week is the first close friend and contemporary to pass. Unless I beat all the rest to eternity, I expect there is more grief in my future, thus the Reeves quote above. 

    One day at a time,

        Leta