February 14--A Flexible Heart

Blessed are the hearts that can bend; they shall never be broken. 
--St. Francis de Sales

    It seems to me that there is a mighty fine line between a bent heart and a broken one, and there's a very slippery substance on that line. Tears and snot? 

    My heart is definitely bent now. I learned yesterday that my brother and his wife were both in the hospital for a time this past week. Both have multiple serious health issues, and it is becoming increasingly untenable for them to continue to live on their own. This is creating great stress for their children who live nearby. It is all very much a heart-bender. I'm in Kansas, they are in Ohio, and due to the pandemic, it has been much too long a time since I have visited them. We do talk often, but that's not the same. Things are such that a phone call announcing the transition of either or both would not surprise me, but it would certainly push me over that slippery line into "broken heart," at least for a time.

    Let's look at today's quote more generally. If we can take things in that rough up the heart, feel the feelings, recognize such things as a part of life, and keep faith that Something Bigger is in charge, then we do have a flexible heart that can bend. Flexibility, the ability to bounce back, is key. We grieve and move on. Getting stuck, holding on to pain, hurt, anger, resentment--this leads to heartbreak. As humans, we will most likely feel times of heart-bend and heart-break--it's simply part of the emotional gamut we signed up for in choosing to be here. I'm guessing that a review of the past year of your life will point out both bends and breaks. I thank Something Bigger for the infinite flow of love moving through our hearts and sustaining us. 

        Leta

February 13--The Heart Is Right

When the heart is right, the mind and body will follow.  --Coretta Scott King

    I believe the heart is always right. It is our innate state. We are born with the perfect inner guidance of our hearts. It is the "hard-wired" connection to the All-That-Is that sustains us through each earthly life adventure. 

    Being raised in the U.S. culture, we are generally taught that the head is more valid than the heart. I'm figuring this is because all those heart-felt feelings make those raising us quite uncomfortable. When the head takes over, all manner of messes can arise--violence, greed, corruption, us vs. them, resentments, vengeance, racism--the list is endless. 

    It is no small challenge to buck the current and live in touch with one's heart wisdom, allowing the mind and body to follow it. Like all skills, it is one improved by daily practice. It takes time, quiet attention, and listening. (Check out the Jan. 24 post and its reference to Heartmath.) Sometimes, when pressed for a too-soon decision, I've learned that it's OK and wise to say, "I don't have my guidance yet." The grace involved in following one's heart feels good, feels right, and makes it comfortable for the mind and body to follow. 

    Loving my heart,

        Leta

Couldn't resist this one! JOY!

February 12--"Just the Way I Am"

Forgive your anger. Forgive your guilt. Your shame. Your sadness. Embrace and open up your love, your joy, your truth, and most especially your heart.   
--Jim Henson

    Here's a paradox. We are all a mess, yet there's nothing to fix. At one time or another, every one of us feels anger, guilt, shame and sadness--human emotions resulting from the choices we make. Sometimes we pack up those emotions in lovely baggage and lug them around for a lengthy amount of time. If we take our attention away from those universal human emotions, however, and embrace love, joy and truth, we know in our hearts that there is nothing to fix--we are in touch with Spirit that loves and accepts us just the way we are. 

    As the "writing gods" would have it, yesterday in my miscellaneous reading I found the perfect bit for today's blog. This comes from James Finley, a teacher at the Center for Action and Contemplation: "My spiritual practice is to sit each day in childlike sincerity with an inner stance that offers the least resistance to being overtaken by the God-given, godly nature of myself just the way I am."

    You and I live love, joy and truth when we open our hearts to let those godly qualities shine forth. 

        Leta

Colorado State University Gardens, 2020
I LOVE flowers!

February 11--Sorrow's Gifts

Sorrow fully accepted brings its own gifts. For there is alchemy in sorrow. It can be transmuted into wisdom, which, if it does not bring joy, can yet bring happiness.  --Pearl S. Buck

    "Yippee! Let's do sorrow today!" said no one, ever. It is not a favorite space to be. It hurts. It cuts deeply. It implies that permanent endings may be involved. Being fully present and feeling sorrow is certainly not something our society encourages. We are more of the "Get over it!" mindset. 

    Yet Ms. Buck tells us that sorrow has gifts for us, transformative gifts. Note that if you have experienced a great sorrow, you have come through it a different person. The death of a loved one, a serious illness or accident, or a significant trauma (a pandemic!) changes us forever. It is fairly impossible not to learn something from these experiences, increasing our wisdom and the confidence of knowing we can move through sorrow to a happier place. 

    Sorrow fully accepted--feeling it and letting it move out of the body--keeps it from being held in and festering. The pain of sorrow enlightens us to the toughness of the human condition and thereby inspires empathy. Judgmentalism fades as we realize that we don't know what is happening with another, that we are all doing the best we can with what we understand at the time. I can say from personal experience that lessening judgments certainly brings happiness, though it is a necessary daily practice. Sorrow can enlighten us to what we truly value, make us more appreciative of the blessings of life. Sorrow helps us to realize the support we have in life, be it family, friends, or Something Bigger. Sorrow is a direct channel to the soul, and that's a potent opening for happiness, and ultimately, joy. 

        Leta

Alan Seeger Natural Area, Pennsylvania...
Probably my favorite spot on Earth

February 10--"All is as it Should Be"

The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be. --Anne Frank

    I had an experience a few years ago which changed me forever. I was leading a retreat in the magnificent Flint Hills of Kansas. There was a hilltop area with huge slabs of granite where one could lie "alone with the heavens, nature and God." I reclined there around sunset. It happened to be the night of a supermoon. I had the sun setting on one side of me, and the supermoon rising on the other side, with billions of stars beginning to twinkle in between. Such experiences don't lend themselves well to words. Suffice it to say that I came away with the knowing that "all is as it should be," now and forever. Something bigger than me has everything well in hand, and I have no need to worry. I think of that time often to bring myself back to a space of peace. 

    Go outside and find something beautiful,

        Leta

February 9--Ripples Through Generations

Everybody talks about wanting to change things and help and fix--but ultimately all you can do is fix yourself. Because if you can fix yourself, it has a ripple effect.  --Rob Reiner

    I know the ripple effect to be true. I've witnessed it working both ways. I was raised in a multi-generational family of addicts who had no inkling of a need to fix themselves, and the "ripple effect" was a set of three offspring who all turned out to be addicts. One of my brothers has passed. The other brother and I have spent decades in recovery. One thing that is front-and-center in the 12-Step programs is "ultimately all you can do is fix yourself." A person determined to improve their well-being by releasing self-destructive behaviors is a powerful force for good, and such folks uniting to carry the message definitely has a ripple effect, even in multiple generations. Living life in a healthy and successful manner is noteworthy. People recognize it soul-to-soul, and it is a powerful example for good that spreads. Such is the concept of sponsorship in the 12-Step programs. 

    Here is my affirmative version of the Serenity Prayer: God grants me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. 

    Enjoying the ripples,

        Leta

February 8--Grateful for Grace

It is the nature of grace to fill the places that have been empty.  --Goethe

    This is a powerful truth for which I am ever so grateful. Grace is a mighty leader, if we will allow her to lead us. I spent many years of my life trying to fill the places that were empty in me with food. I'm here to tell you...that does not work. I knew overeating was a symptom, not the real problem. Reaching for help and recovery brought me the understanding of my empty places--that was and is grace in action.

    I've been around a lot of addicts in my life, primarily those seeking recovery. I've seen all manner of empty places: broken relationships, poor health, low self-esteem, resentments, emotional shut-down, fearfulness and paranoia, loneliness, self-destruction and suffering. It is the willingness to allow grace to change us that makes all the difference. Misery loves company, but so does grace.

    One of my favorite instances lately of grace is the arrival in our lives of our angel dog, Barney. We wanted a rescue, one that at least looked similar to a Golden Retriever. We were in no hurry. Grace provided us a friend who volunteers with a rescue organization. When Barney was turned over to them, very ill, my friend alerted us. He was treated, recovered, and became ours just a couple months before the pandemic hit hard. I guess we didn't know how empty our doggie space was, but it is full to overflowing now with love and joy. It is an outstanding amount of grace to have another presence to love in our home. (Barney's photo is on yesterday's post.)

    Willing for grace,

        Leta