April 22--The Memorial and the Aftermath

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.   --Mother Teresa

    Being around friends and family for a memorial service is a great reminder that we belong to each other. Even if we don't see each other all that often, there is loads of history and love there connecting us. 

    My brother's memorial started with a three-shot military salute (which is considered "21-gun"), and the presentation of the U.S. flag to Arlie's eldest son. Arlie's three kids offered me the flag, an overwhelming gesture of love, but I wanted it to go to someone who will likely be around longer than me. It is tradition to give it to the eldest son. Then they played Taps, which completely did me in. 

    My niece had a bunch of us in the family write a couple sentences about fond memories of Arlie, and his grandson Nick held it together enough to read them during the memorial. The minister spoke briefly (that's a good thing). I would guess that between the visitation time and the service that nearly 100 folks passed through. I'd bet that nearly half those who showed up were Arlie's AA buddies. It was a fitting celebration, even though it barely touched on Arlie's amazing life. 

    So now it has hit me... since I'm the last one living from my family of birth, I'm the next one to pass. I am fully aware that this is logically a big "DUH!" But for someone who is having a hard time with aging, especially having just witnessed my brother's dreadful decline, this idea is quite troubling. 

    Arlie has always been the main reason I went back east to visit. He was my bro that I love and wanted to always stay in touch with. We talked often. Will I still feel the same draw back east? Certainly my niece (Arlie's daughter) and I are very close, and we will continue to meet up for fun. I must remember the quote above: we belong to each other.

    I'm just feeling very melancholy right now. Getting back home (final leg today) will help. 

    The processing shall continue...

        Leta

    In honor of Earth Day, I offer this Native American proverb:

Treat the Earth well: It was not given to you by your parents, it was loaned to you by your children. We do not inherit the Earth from our ancestors. We borrow it from our children.