I have been doing some "deep-dive" work lately relative to my experience growing up with my mother and the younger of my two brothers. My brother worked with Dad and his family lived nearby, so I was around the kitchen table with him and my mom every day. It was the primary site of ongoing verbal and emotional abuse, labeled as "just teasing." (I advise you, dear readers, to be very wary of those words.)
What my deep-dive has ultimately pointed out is that I have no clue about their lives before I came on the scene, leaving me in no position to judge them. What caused my mom to become a codependent food addict who ultimately killed herself via bulimia? What caused my brother to become a sister-hating narcissist? They both had trauma in their lives just like me. That's a good point--we all have had traumatic experiences. This does not condone bad behavior, but it does encourage us to cut each other some slack. I forgive my mother and brother as they were just doing their jobs (in the big-picture-cosmic-sense) the best they knew how.
As forgiveness expands, so does personal freedom.
Leta
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