August 31--Highs and Lows

I pray to be like the ocean, with soft currents, maybe waves at times. More and more, I want the consistency rather than the highs and the lows. 
--Drew Barrymore

    Today completes 2/3 of 2025. It seems that the mission of this year is to teach me to flow with the highs and lows of life. I had a super high with the six-week trip to Australia, New Zealand and Bali. I returned home with the super low of excruciating pain from sciatica. That took me through life-ending consideration and left me with months of physical therapy and SLOW recovery with ongoing stamina, balance, nerve and foot issues. I have not had this great of a physical low in decades, not even with my 2020 hip replacement. The four or five miles a day that I walked on the big vacation is merely a pipe dream now. Walking with a cane to attempt to keep my gait normal has been only somewhat successful. That has exacerbated the ache in my right shoulder, now diagnosed as tendinopathy. If I followed the adage, "If it hurts, don't do it," I would never move again. 

    My son and daughter-in-law moved my grandsons even further away, from Colorado to Minnesota--a big low. But they purchased and moved into a log cabin on five acres of woods next to a river, so it is a magnificent place to thrive and raise two little boys--a big high. 

   Other highs of this year so far were the great vacation with my niece, and my son and grandsons visiting in June. I could not have made it through all this without being able to swim laps, which is great for me physically but also helps me stay sane. While I have been able to play pickleball (gently!) a few times, I miss my old routine of playing three or four times a week. 

    Another "mixed bag" this year has been a tremendous amount of personal shadow work resulting in an extraordinary release of anger via journaling, screaming, sobbing and raging.

    My painting hobby and my sweet dog Barney have truly been lifesavers. 

    So far this has been a year of both incredibly good and truly bad stuff. As of right now, I can't say that I will look back on 2025 with warm, fuzzy feelings. Yet I'm still hopeful for the last third of the year!

    One day at a time!!

        Leta