Pitchfork in Hands

     I have found that it is amazing what some folks will say to a person who has a pitchfork in her hands. One incident I could have blown off, but now it has happened twice. So with some ironic humor, I share these incidents here.
     In both cases, the pitchfork was for loading mulch into a cart to be spread around our garden. It's a dirty, sweaty job, but ultimately, it saves a lot of weeding.
     The first incident occurred when my older son was probably in the 12-14 years old range. I was in hot, sweaty, forking mode when my son stopped, looked at me, and said, "Boy, Mom, you sure have a lot of gray hair." With an exceedingly threatening "mom look," my reply was, "I have a pitchfork in my hands, and I know how to use it!" He high-tailed it outta there.
     Fast forward to last week, and the huge pile of mulch left in our front yard after having massive tree trimming done around our house. I'll refer to the offender this time as Fence, because it was the neighbor directly behind our house who doesn't take care of the place, and whose fence has been falling on our property literally for years. Her backyard is full of numerous noxious weeds that have invaded our garden and cause me considerable weeding effort. I feel much angst toward this person.
     Fence was visiting our next-door neighbor, saw me working on the mulch pile, and yelled, "Looking good, Leta!" My first thought was, "I have a pitchfork in my hands, and I know how to use it!" Fortunately my husband was nearby, saw the look on my face, and winked at me to diffuse my inclinations.
     Be very cautious when speaking to someone with a pitchfork in their hands!
             Leta