Mumma's Wisdom

     This is lessons from mumma included in the book by rupi kaur titled "the sun and her flowers."

when it came to listening
my mother taught me silence
if you are drowning their voice with yours
how will you hear them she asked

when it came to speaking
she said do it with commitment
every word you say
is your own responsibility

when it came to being
she said be tender and tough at once
you need to be vulnerable to live fully
but rough enough to survive it all

when it came to choosing
she asked me to be thankful
for the choices i had that
she never had the privilege of making

     So very thankful,
               Leta

Spirit's Delivery System -or- Why I Love Estate Sales

     I love going to estate sales. I find a treasure here and there, useful items and occasional curiosities. I love to see old-time things like my mom used when I was growing up. I'm not a collector of anything, and I generally don't have much of a want list. It's a game of "what goodies does Spirit have in store for me this week?" I can go to several sales in a day, buy nothing, but thoroughly enjoy the experience of looking. (On a side note, I would say that there are enough sets of dishes in Wichita alone to supply every person on the planet with their own set.)
     I used to have a great set of steel shaft golf clubs, Ping I-3s. In a fit of madness, I handed them off to son Eliot, because he likes the feel of them so much. I was thinking (this is the madness) that it would be good for me as an "aging" golfer to get graphite-shaft clubs. However, after two years of playing with graphite-shaft clubs, I was so frustrated that I decided I was either going to return to the Ping I-3s or quit golfing.
     So I got on Ebay. Given that the Ping I-3s are an "older" model, I had no trouble getting another set for a reasonable price. The only thing the set did not have was a sand/lob wedge, so I kept one from a previous graphite-shaft set to use in those dreadful instances when my ball lands in the beach.
     Today I was at an estate sale, where I am always on the lookout for golf clubs and equipment. (I've scored some of my best wood deals at estate sales for less than $10.) I found a golf bag with a motley assortment of clubs, and the bag and all was marked $95. Within this batch of no-name clubs was a solo Ping I-3 lob wedge! What are the chances?!?!?! So I took it up to the check-out desk and asked if I could purchase just the one club, since it was not part of a set. The two women there agreed, then one said to the other, "I have no idea how much to charge for it." They looked questioningly at me, and I said, "I'll give you $5 for it." They said, "OK, but I hope you aren't low-balling us on that." Given what I had paid for my set of Pings, and given that it was 20% off day at the estate sale, $5 was a decent deal for them, and I feel like I got the deal of the century. That club was meant for me, and I am sure Spirit was giggling at all the fun involved in getting me and that club together. I love a little surprise and serendipity such as this. What fun!
     Life is good!
            Leta

Mother's Day, A Mixed Bag

     I thought I'd offer up a variety of thoughts regarding Mother's Day, from the non-Hallmark perspective.
     My own mother transitioned when I was 23 years old (I'm now 62), so I've been through decades of Mother's Days wherein it seems like everyone except me has a mother. So I am sensitive to the fact that Mother's Day (like Christmas) is not necessarily a great day for all.
     I consider the pain:

• of those desperately wanting to be a mother, but so far that hasn't happened
• of those who recently (or not so recently) lost a mother dear to them
• of those mothers who have lost children
• of those who did not or do not have a pleasing relationship with their mother or children
• of those whose own family doesn't appreciate the gift that a mother is
• of those who choose not to be a mother, and are nagged about it
• of those watching and caring for a mother suffering and declining with age
• of the fathers who also serve as mothers and are not recognized as such

     The best thing I have ever been called is "Mom." I have an awesome mother-in-law and my son's love, Aliza, is an outstanding mother to 5-year-old Paisley. I know the trials, tribulations, risks and rewards of motherhood. I have wonderful relationships with both my sons, for which I am extraordinarily grateful. While loosing my mother at such a young age is not something I would wish on anyone, I see in hindsight, that event dramatically changed my life, and helped to make me who I am today, and I am happy with me. 
     So, like Mother Mary, on Mother's Day, I shall "treasure all these things and ponder them in my heart."
     Love to all from this mother on Mother's Day,
                   Leta

Body Appreciation, A Lifelong Process

     Our culture has a thing for the "perfect body." It seems to permeate the air around us. It's a huge billion dollar industry encouraging us to change into something better, more beautiful, younger-looking, on and on and on. How can we ever learn to appreciate our physical selves if we are constantly being pressured to fix our many assorted "flaws"? When we are coaxed to look like someone else with hair dyes, face lifts, boob jobs and all the rest?
     My journey of body appreciation began with two items of significance. The first was loving and thanking my body's ability to grow and birth two healthy children. The second was to immerse myself in addiction recovery and stop the decades of abuse I had put my body through.
     My body appreciation continues to expand through daily self care and learning more about our bodies as a yoga and MELT Method instructor. I am in awe of my body's ability to heal itself, and I have experienced this in various ways as I have explored assorted healing methods for various aches and ailments over time. Adding a bit of humor to the whole topic, I often recall a spiritual mentor of mine saying, "Nobody looks good naked."
     Caila, love of my older son, Derek, blessed me last Christmas with a book titled "the sun and her flowers" by rupi kaur. It is a powerful and magnificent work of both text and drawing. I close with this writing from the book:

i reduced my body to aesthetics
forgot the work it did to keep me alive
with every beat and breath
declared it a grand failure for not looking like theirs
searched everywhere for a miracle
foolish enough to not realize
i was already living in one

     Please find one thing today to appreciate about your magnificent body.
           Leta